Caught the show “Beowulf" at bugis today.

The showtime is pretty early, less than 20 people in the whole theatre.

Ok, when the show start, its only then i realised that this is not a by real actors, but rather very nice CGs that really lets you recognize Angelina Jolie when you see one of the characters.

Firstly, spoilers ahead. Ok, the story goes that in one of the small kingdoms in Denmark, there is a old king with a young queen. During his younger days, he was a famed monster slayer. Yet now his kingdom is often harassed by a troll by the name of Grendel. Little people knew that, this troll is the offspring of the old king and the beautiful monster (whose appearance is based on Angelina Jolie).

So one stormy nite, this hunk by the name of Beowulf and his gang came rowing to this land and offer to the king his ability to slay the monster. Beowulf’s father and the old king seems to be friends but that not really important. The king offer a golden horn, which he got it when he slayed a fire breathing dragon when younger, to Beowulf as a reward.

So that nite, Beowulf and his gang waited in the grand hall waiting for the troll to appear. The troll is especially disturbed by merry-making sounds, so Beowulf’s gang sang loudly to lure the troll. It came, killed off a couple of the gang before being defeated by Beowulf. It lost an arm but managed to flee back to its mother before dying.

The mother was super pissed. She came while everyone was drunk from the celebrations and finished off Beowulf’s gang except one. Beowulf thus is forced to face the mother. He went to the deepest parts of the mountain, the cave where the mother waits. However, he was tempted by Angelina Jolie. Who won’t when she stands naked in front of you, ask you to (i) have sex with her, leave behind the golden horn and enjoy peace & riches as king or (ii) die at her hands because there is no way Beowulf can defeat her. Which one would you choose?

So Beowulf must have a terribly good time of his life, went back to the old king and claimed he finished off the old ugly monster. The old king, relieved now that his land is no longer cursed by his old flame, hands over his crown to Beowulf and jumped to his death.

So Beowulf inherited the kingdom, the young queen and lived happily until one fine day, a good for nothing picked up the golden horn from the swamps and returned it back to the king (unwillingly). Its when all the trouble began.

Now, the offspring of Beowulf and Angelina is no troll. Its a fucking fire-breathing dragon. It starts to create havoc in the towns by jus breathing on the poor folks and Beowulf decide that he himself has to confront his child and old flame once again to stop this vicious cycle. A very very nice dragon slaying sequence take place and eventually, the dragon died.

Overall, the show is entertaining but then its still CGs. Its like watching those PC game trailers (except this one is super long) but you can’t help feel that some of the scenes inside would not have been possible if real actors were used instead. And you definitely won’t see a naked Angelina Jolie.

I give Beowulf a 70 out of 100. The show packs some nice scenes but its not good enough to leave a lasting impression. Can do lah if you are not picky.

Something on an un-related note and got me more excited than Beowulf the show itself. AVP2 is coming!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11111111111